Which bucket are you operating in: "because of" or "in spite of"?
Want to know how you can positively impact your own skills profile, a one-on-one discussion, team discussion, or leadership team? Go get two buckets. In the first bucket, place all your or others positive, encouraging, or productive comments. This is the "because of" bucket. Each of us are successful for different reasons. Think..."I am successful or effective 'because of' [insert reason here]". How big is your "because of bucket"? What is in there? What would others say is in your "because of" bucket? Take inventory of the content of your "because of" bucket and leverage it.
In the second bucket is the "in spite of" attributes. Individuals, meetings, and teams are successful "in spite of" things too. Perform the same analysis here too. You are successful "in spite of" several attributes. Take inventory, and learn to minimaze or neutralize these attributes. By doing so, you will do yourself and your teams a favor.
In your change teams, practice the two buckets on a personal level to encourage development, and on a project and team level to marginalize bad behavior. The change agents in your teams should always look for "in spite of" behaviors, discussions, comments, and attitudes. Make this second nature, like walking or breathing. Get your teams to a point where they dont even think about the two buckets, they just instinctively "bucketize" things as a part of their normal course of business. Start with a personal assessment of yourself, and move out from there.
Everyday, challenge yourself and your teams, which bucket are you in? Is the change successful "because of" your actions or "in spite of" your actions?